Dear Mr. Eugene and Miss Katrina,
I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I didn’t want to. But I did, and then you yelled back. You scared me. I was scared of what you would do next. After you shouted at me you had this look in your eyes. I haven’t seen that look for a long time. I hoped I would never see it again. It was the look my mother gave me when I tried to stop her from drinking. It was the look Vance’s friends gave me before they beat me up. It was the look Mr. Skint gave me before he threw something at me. And you had that look. I guess I thought you would do the same thing. You made me cry. I cried because I let you down. I cried because I was scared. After I saw how angry you were, I fell on the ground, helpless, waiting for a hard, sharp blow to the head. But it never came. You didn’t scold me. You didn’t hit me. You didn’t throw anything at me. You didn’t even tell me to get up. Instead, you got on the ground with me. You held me in your secure harmless arms until I stopped crying. Then you apologized. You told me you were sorry. You said you did something wrong. There was no blaming. No anger. Just love. But you were angry, weren’t you? Just like my mother, Vance’s gang, or Mr. Skint. So what made your anger different?
Ephesians 4:26, “In your anger do not sin.”
The day I took Buck to the police station was one of the hardest days of my life. I hated sending him away like that. He cried the whole way to the police station. He just held the few things he had left and looked out the window with tears streaming down his beautiful cheeks. Everything in me was screaming not to turn him in. I wanted to turn the car around and put him somewhere safe until it was all over. But we both knew it was the right thing to do. At his trial, he just kept his head on my shoulder and I held his hand that trembled with fear. While he was up on the stand he kept looking back at me as if to make sure I wasn't going to leave him like everyone else had. I'll never forget the face he made when the judge sentenced him. And by the time we had said our last farewells I knew he had no pride left. I just remember crying into Eugene's arms wondering how I could have abandoned him.
"So, a lot of you have asked me to tell you about my life before I came to Odyssey, so I decided to make my report about that. So um, here it goes." As I read my essay the whole scene played out in my head.
I walked through the door of our little trailer, a place I once called home. Mr. Skint sat at the table, dazed and holding a large bottle of beer. "Mr. Skint I- Oh. Um, I'll come back later."
"No. You'll stay right here." I closed the flimsy, plastic door behind me. "Tell me how it went."
"I- I lost him."
"I'm sorry Mr. Skint, I really am. I'll make it right. W-we can fix it."
"I'm not worried about that now. What did I tell you would happen if you messed this up?"
"No Mr. Skint. Please. Please."
"Into the bedroom Buck." He rose from the chair and walked towards me.
"Mr. Skint, please! I can find him again, don't hurt me." He pushed me several times until I was in the bedroom. Helpless, I ran to the corner. "What are you gonna do?" He didn't answer. He just locked the door and went to the closet. My heart raced and my mouth went dry. I didn't know what to do. I never did. Mr. Skint pulled a leather belt from the closet. "Turn around boy." All I could say was, "No. Please no." He angrily grunted and grabbed my wrist. I tried to break free but he was too strong. He shoved me onto the ground and to my terror threw his bottle at me. It hit my back and shattered. I shouted in pain and felt streams of blood fall down my back and soak through my clothes. Tears rolled down my face and now too petrified to move, I complied with his wishes. I pulled myself up, put my head on the bed and grasped the covers with all my might. I held back sobs and waited. Then the whipping began. With every blow, glass cut into my skin and the feel of leather burned my back. I had never seen Mr. Skint so angry. He cursed at me, said he wished I was never born and that he hated me. He only beat me for half an hour but it felt like an eternity. I cried the whole time, begging him to stop but it didn't do any good. He afflicted so much emotional and physical pain that by the time he finally let off, I felt utterly useless. Through blurred eyes I stumbled into the bathroom with the little energy I had left and immediately threw up in the toilet. I guess Mr. Skint found it funny or something, cause I heard him laugh. Desperate to get away I forced myself out of the room, grabbed my stuffed dog, (the last present my mom had given me), and ran to the nearest pond. I just curled up on the wooden dock and cried for hours. And with each rain drop and tear that fell, I too wished I had never been born. A lot of kids in Odyssey have told me that they wish they could go on the adventures I've gone on, or live the way I lived, and every time someone says that, it confuses me because I never understand why someone would wish they could be in pain.
My voice shook as I finished my presentation and I don't know why but everyone clapped as I sat back down. I looked up at Miss Katrina who had tears of pride in her eyes. She smiled at me and silently mouthed the words, 'I will never hurt you.'
- Cookies & Creme
- Posts: 291
- Joined: February 2016
- Location: At Von Odyssey Manor in Odyssey, Canada
(Card: [Baron von Odyssey - writer, book lover, fairytale enthusiast, and AIO fan])
My posts are awesome! You wanna know why?
Strength for today, and bright hope for tomorrow.
"Why does Connie shower all of the time?" ~CGM_Games
It's interesting how Eugene doesn't communicate his emotion--and Katrina interprets it as not affecting him. (kinda reminds me how in my story Connie didn't think
in Eugene's POV deserve is spelled "disserve".
Ok so here's the last two! Tell me what you think!
It would be easier to read if there were some paragraph breaks, though.