Christian Modesty and Purity Culture

[Blitz]

Whats up with no shirts that looked painted or ripped jeans look? Those aren't really not okay.

Okay so on this note. What would the females on this board consider immodest for men?

[Connie G.]

Whats up with no shirts that looked painted?

What's that mean?

[Doll]

Whats up with no shirts that looked painted?

What's that mean?

My guess is shirts that are meant to look like they aren't actually fabric, but rather just paint on your body?

[Miss Friendship]

What would the females on this board consider immodest for men?

I don't think you are going to get many responses since someone is going to disagree.

But I'd feel very uncomfortable wearing a bikini in public. Just no.

[GJFH]

Honestly Blitz,

I can only speak for myself...wearing tight fitting pants I'd consider immodest. And I mean tight. Speedos too . Another problem arises when men choose to wear pants that are so incredibly loose fitting they reveal undergarments.
Thank you for asking

[TigerShadow]

Another problem arises when men choose to wear pants that are so incredibly loose fitting they reveal undergarments.

See, I'm just prone to thinking that it looks stupid and unprofessional. (I'll answer your PM soon, by the way; this weekend has been crazy busy.)

Okay so on this note. What would the females on this board consider immodest for men?

I'd consider walking around with no shirt on or with the shirt unbuttoned enough that we can see substantial portions of your chest to be immodest.

[GJFH]

Well yes, it does look stupid and unprofessional. Though seeing as I've seen a few Christian guys doing it I'd also call it immodest. I mean, when they hang low enough tighter material is shown underneath, the garment usually shown by male models.
And I agree with TigerShadow. Going shirtless all together I would consider immodest. I don't know how many people agree though I don't find it pleasant when guys do this. The issue remains you're showing off a great deal, and often for attention. Girls can be stimulated by sight as well and when we see a guy with his shirt off we might definitely glance away immediately. The image still lingers though.
I think a Christian man going shirtless can affect either him or the other crowd. He's dismissing the idea what he wears has influence.

[Audrey]

Okay so on this note. What would the females on this board consider immodest for men?

Personally, depends on the situation. I don't really care either way to be honest. It's not my job to decide what's immodest on other people if that makes any sense? But if I had to pick something I would consider immodest, I guess going shirtless when there's no reason to. If you're out running, or swimming, or doing an outdoor activity where it would be easier and cooler (as in physically) for you to go shirtless, go for it. Do all guys look good with no shirt, no. But I wouldn't consider that immodest.

However, if you're somewhere like school, church, or even in a grocery store or anywhere indoors really, put your dang shirt on.

Also, speedos. Yuck.

[Kathy0]

But I'd feel very uncomfortable wearing a bikini in public. Just no.

Same I am like only one of all the girls even in my church that does not wear a bikini! Its just like why? I think its kinda gross! Maybe I am wrong to say that but... Thats what I am saying!

-- Sun Nov 06, 2016 9:26 pm --

Well yes, it does look stupid and unprofessional. Though seeing as I've seen a few Christian guys doing it I'd also call it immodest. I mean, when they hang low enough tighter material is shown underneath, the garment usually shown by male models.
And I agree with TigerShadow. Going shirtless all together I would consider immodest. I don't know how many people agree though I don't find it pleasant when guys do this. The issue remains you're showing off a great deal, and often for attention. Girls can be stimulated by sight as well and when we see a guy with his shirt off we might definitely glance away immediately. The image still lingers though.
I think a Christian man going shirtless can affect either him or the other crowd. He's dismissing the idea what he wears has influence.

I agree totally! Its saying bad stuff about you. It says that I am available or such. I also want to take a second glance when a young man is shirtless.
One time we were at home and my dad was moving the lawn and he had his shirt off. My little sister peeked out the window and was like EWWW! She ran outside and brought him a t-shirt! It was kinda funny! I mean I think its ok for stuff like that. I mean we were not in public. Plus my dads old and married! XD

[Doll]

Honestly, I hate the excuse that guys need to cover up to stop girl's thoughts just as much as I hate the excuse that girls need to cover up to stop guy's thoughts.

No. They're your own thoughts. You stop them. Don't use the excuse that you couldn't help yourself because someone else was immodest. That just moves the blame around. Put the blame on yourself and work on it.

The time it annoys me when guys are shirtless, is when it's in a dining setting, like a restaurant, or the cafeteria at school. Those places have a "no shirt, no shoes, no service" rule, but guys tend to get away with shirts that have gaping arm holes, which is frankly unsanitary.

[Kathy0]

Honestly, I hate the excuse that guys need to cover up to stop girl's thoughts just as much as I hate the excuse that girls need to cover up to stop guy's thoughts.

No. They're your own thoughts. You stop them. Don't use the excuse that you couldn't help yourself because someone else was immodest. That just moves the blame around. Put the blame on yourself and work on it.

The time it annoys me when guys are shirtless, is when it's in a dining setting, like a restaurant, or the cafeteria at school. Those places have a "no shirt, no shoes, no service" rule, but guys tend to get away with shirts that have gaping arm holes, which is frankly unsanitary.

Same! I don't mind when they are working hard and stuff! Lol! I guess your right... they are our own thoughts!

[Audrey]

Honestly, I hate the excuse that guys need to cover up to stop girl's thoughts just as much as I hate the excuse that girls need to cover up to stop guy's thoughts.

No. They're your own thoughts. You stop them. Don't use the excuse that you couldn't help yourself because someone else was immodest. That just moves the blame around. Put the blame on yourself and work on it.

The time it annoys me when guys are shirtless, is when it's in a dining setting, like a restaurant, or the cafeteria at school. Those places have a "no shirt, no shoes, no service" rule, but guys tend to get away with shirts that have gaping arm holes, which is frankly unsanitary.

Exactly. Why are my thoughts your responsibility? I think a lot of dumb stuff and I don't blame people for them.

I agree with that. The only time I think it is okay is places like the beach; I've gone to the beach a ton of times with friends and most of the restaurants around there don't have a rule like that because people are going to do it anyways. I personally put a shirt on because I think bikinis should stay on the beach, but only about half of my guy friends will put a shirt on. A lot of said restaurants are very open (aka like no walls/most of the seating is outside) so it doesn't really matter too much anyways.

Also, UGH I HATE THOSE SHIRTS. Is it even a shirt when it has the same sort of shape as a sandwich board? xD

[Kaida]

Honestly, I hate the excuse that guys need to cover up to stop girl's thoughts just as much as I hate the excuse that girls need to cover up to stop guy's thoughts.

No. They're your own thoughts. You stop them. Don't use the excuse that you couldn't help yourself because someone else was immodest. That just moves the blame around. Put the blame on yourself and work on it.

You should definitely work on yourself and your thoughts. I totally agree. Don't just put the blame on someone else.
But I definitely think both genders should help each other out.
Is that guy who doesn't put on a shirt thinking that he just wants to be comfortable or is he thinking of his sisters in Christ? Is he thinking of what he wants or is he putting others above himself? Is he loving his neighbor?
Same for girls.. Is she thinking of what she wants because what she wants is so important or is she willing to put aside what she wants to think of her brother in Christ? Is she loving her neighbor?
Because in the end, we're called to please God not ourselves. So what are we doing when we clothe ourselves? Who are we aiming to please.

[Miss Friendship]

But I definitely think both genders should help each other out.
Is that guy who doesn't put on a shirt thinking that he just wants to be comfortable or is he thinking of his sisters in Christ? Is he thinking of what he wants or is he putting others above himself? Is he loving his neighbor?
Same for girls.. Is she thinking of what she wants because what she wants is so important or is she willing to put aside what she wants to think of her brother in Christ? Is she loving her neighbor?

I actually disagree that this should even be a focus. Once you start dressing so others don't "fail" you enter an impossible realm because everyone is different and will demand different versions of modesty. The focus needs to be pleasing God and clothing ourselves modestly because He says so, leaving out any other person's standards or whims. Obviously, some may need help in this area and I'm not against getting advice, but I believe we can each grasp a pretty good sense of what's modest and what's not if we use our brains.

[Jo March]

The deal with painted-on shirts is that they are so tight they look like they were painted on.

And I really agree with you, Miss Friendship. I don't think I could have said it better.