My Script

A place to discuss your own works. Whether they may be literary, visual art, or music pieces, this is the place to show off your stuff!
Post Reply

How do you rate this script

1 star
3
30%
2 stars
1
10%
3 stars
2
20%
4 stars
4
40%
5 stars
0
No votes
 
Total votes: 10

User avatar
dolphinlovr4ever
Caramel Crunch
Posts: 177
Joined: July 2013
Location: Somwhere between here and Sunset.

My Script

Post

I was in the inspiration to write somthing and I came up with the first 7 scenes of this script. I am only posting the first 3 though if you like them I will post more. If the poll shows you dont like it it shall be moved to the Archives.This is the original script so it is how it is written in my notebook

Scene 1
Hi this is Chris.....

Scene 2
:jason : Hey Dad there is somthing I want to talk to you Can we go in to your office?
Whit: sure just let me tell Connie I won't be around for an hour
:jason Dad I don't need a hour
Whit:Ya but but I want to talk to you too so I thought we could go done to my house and have coffee
:jason (succuming downcast) OK
Scene 3
Whit: Connie I need you to watch the shop the shop for an hour I will come back to help you close up
Connie: (whiny) Whit , why can't Eugene watch the shop for once in a life timeI always have to Eugene can just go home before closing time and be a lovebird with Katrina
Eugene: I come earlier than you
Connie: DO Not.. I come at 6 PM
Eugene: Ya I Know it I come at 5:30 AM
Connie: Eugene you know I ment 6 AM
Eugene: I did not you said 6 Pm
Whit: You 2 quite arguing and now Eugene I want you two to both stay and close up. Now I won't be coming back. And COnnie I want you to to come with me.
Connie: OK
Footsteps Close the scene



I did not do any editing so this is a rough draft. I noticed Eugene and Connie normally do not get in trouble for arguing Connie is coming
Last edited by dolphinlovr4ever on Tue Aug 20, 2013 9:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
The Old Judge
Mint Chocolate Chip
Posts: 2037
Joined: May 2012
Contact:

Post

Oh no, where are they going? Why are they taking Connie? When will you put up the next scenes?!

Seriously, though, it was good. I loved your utilization of the Jason smiley. That's maybe the second time I've seen anybody use it. Keep writing, because I want to find out what happens.

As a little side note, it would be nice if you checked spelling and punctuation on your next insert. Just makes things a little nicer. I can edit the mistakes out of the first part, if you want me to.
Do you think you know music? Guess the hints at the end of each of my posts in A Musical Journey. (The name's a link. You can click it.)
User avatar
dolphinlovr4ever
Caramel Crunch
Posts: 177
Joined: July 2013
Location: Somwhere between here and Sunset.

Post

i will put up more scenes.............later
I will not reveal any thing else. I am still working on it.I will try to check my spelling and punctuation

-- Wed Aug 21, 2013 9:00 pm
Now is Later
Scene 4
In Whits office
Connie: What do you want?
Whit: Connie DO NOT talk about Eugene like that. He has a wife and he needs to be with her. I think marige life should be important and he should take time to be with his wife.
Connie:OK Whatever
Whit: And I want you to apoligize to Eugene
Connie: Ok I will
Whit: Now I need to go. See ya.
Connie: Bye.


Scene 5:
Connie: Sorry Eugene for what I said about you and Katrina. Whit toldme you need to talk top keep your marige strong. So I guess I understand. It would be very bad if you seperated.
Eugene: OK You are forgiven.



These are very short scenes but I decided to post them any way.

-- Sun Sep 01, 2013 8:49 pm --

Sorry been on 2 trips got lots written none posted :roll:
Will try to post tomorrow I lost the notebook :roll:
Sorry for all the bad news :roll:

ya very lame :roll:
User avatar
I <3 Wooton
Caramel Crunch
Posts: 112
Joined: October 2013
Location: waiting for a madman with a box

Post

Where is the punctuation?! I can't find it.
Raggedy Man I remember you, and you are late for my wedding!
Mickey
Peach Cobbler
Posts: 1367
Joined: June 2014
Location: Somewhere, Someplace, Sometime!

Post

dolphinlovr4ever wrote:I was in the inspiration to write somthing and I came up with the first 7 scenes of this script. I am only posting the first 3 though if you like them I will post more. If the poll shows you dont like it it shall be moved to the Archives.This is the original script so it is how it is written in my notebook

Scene 1
Hi this is Chris.....

Scene 2
:jason : Hey Dad there is somthing I want to talk to you Can we go in to your office?
Whit: sure just let me tell Connie I won't be around for an hour
:jason Dad I don't need a hour
Whit:Ya but but I want to talk to you too so I thought we could go done to my house and have coffee
:jason (succuming downcast) OK
Scene 3
Whit: Connie I need you to watch the shop the shop for an hour I will come back to help you close up
Connie: (whiny) Whit , why can't Eugene watch the shop for once in a life timeI always have to Eugene can just go home before closing time and be a lovebird with Katrina
Eugene: I come earlier than you
Connie: DO Not.. I come at 6 PM
Eugene: Ya I Know it I come at 5:30 AM
Connie: Eugene you know I ment 6 AM
Eugene: I did not you said 6 Pm
Whit: You 2 quite arguing and now Eugene I want you two to both stay and close up. Now I won't be coming back. And COnnie I want you to to come with me.
Connie: OK
Footsteps Close the scene



I did not do any editing so this is a rough draft. I noticed Eugene and Connie normally do not get in trouble for arguing Connie is coming


Love it,but I don't think Eugene uses words like ya,bigger words.Though I know there hard to spell,very good wonderful great lovely want more
Image
Proud K.R.E Member
Post Reply